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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24488680">The things we do in the dark</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/UndeadRobins/pseuds/UndeadRobins'>UndeadRobins</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>S.C.I.谜案集 | S.C.I. Mystery (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>M/M, Sharing a Bed, inability to have a proper conversation, secret confessions</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-06-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-06-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 04:21:50</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>588</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24488680</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/UndeadRobins/pseuds/UndeadRobins</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Some things can only happen when the sun has set and the lights are off and the two of them are pretending that things between them are different.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Bai Yutong/Zhan Yao</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>113</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The things we do in the dark</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I was three episodes into watching this show when I started writing this. Bai Yutong and Zhan Yao have wormed their way into my heart. Thanks to my own Cat - it's always fun to fall into a fandom with you! ♥</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Some things can only happen when the sun has set and the lights are off and the two of them are pretending that things between them are different.</p>
<p>They lay on their sides with their backs to each other. Neither of them is sleeping, despite the late hour. The only light in the room is the soft glow from the lamp in the living room, its orange-tinted light seeping beneath the closed door. For a long time, the only sound is their matched breathing, occasionally hitching when one of them thinks too hard about the previous 12 hours.</p>
<p>“I hate seeing you get hurt.”</p>
<p>Some days they don’t speak, their hands and lips making the confessions, but tonight Bai Yutong breaks the silence. His voice is barely above a whisper, but here, in this secret time, it’s loud enough for Zhan Yao to hear clearly. This is how they do it, how they talk to each other. Only when it’s dark enough that they can pretend things are different. </p>
<p>“I felt like killing him,” he confesses. He’s thinking about the man who drove the knife into Zhan Yao’s hand. “All I could see was blood. Your blood.”</p>
<p>Zhan Yao doesn’t answer. He clenches his hand on purpose, grimacing as pain shoots through it. He can stand the pain, that’s familiar to him. It’s the feeling of guilt he can’t deal with. He shouldn’t have let himself get into a position where he could get hurt. He should have been quicker, smarter, braver. All the things that Yutong is. All the things he probably wishes Zhan Yao was. </p>
<p>Yutong turns over in the bed, jostling the mattress enough to make his intentions clear. It doesn’t always go like this; some nights it’s only words, but tonight they both need the extra reassurance. He reaches across Zhan and sides his own hand into Zhan Yao’s bandaged one. He’s as gentle in this as he is with everything else, but it’s enough that Zhan Yao can't hurt himself again.  </p>
<p>“You know I can hear you thinking, right?”</p>
<p>Zhan Yao smiles, even though he knows Yutong can’t see it. He wants to say something, but he doesn’t know what words could make it better. He allows Yutong to wrap around him tighter, his arm curling around his chest, his hand flat over his heart. They’re both breathing hard, but it’s in sync like everything else they do. Yutong is pressed up against his back, his bare feet twisted around Zhan Yao’s as if to keep him from moving away. Yutong’s breath is warm on the back of his neck, and his lips are close enough to his skin that he can feel their movement as clearly as he can hear the words. </p>
<p>“I don’t know what I’d do without you.”</p>
<p>Tomorrow they’ll go back to bickering and hunting criminals and pretending that this is nothing more than two friends sharing a bed for convenience. But tonight, made brave by the darkness and the quiet, Yutong’s lips brush against Zhan Yao’s neck, leaving soft kisses that neither will admit to needing. </p>
<p>“Don’t leave me?”</p>
<p>It’s question rather than an order, and Yutong sounds more scared than he ever has done before.  Zhan Yao can’t reply. If he replies it makes this a conversation. And if it’s conversation, they both need to accept things they’re not ready for.  Instead, he brings his other hand up, curling his fingers around the hand laying protectively on his chest, and squeezes. </p>
<p>Yutong will understand. He always does.</p>
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